dont forget the part where you pretend you’re having a really sad moment in the rain
And the period shower where you stand and watch the blood flowing down the drain as if you just got back from a war or brawl.
As a girl I can confirm that all of this happens.
Yes it does.
It really does
the penis people’s showers are so boring compared to this
I think that’s enough tumblr for now..
Ellen winning her 14th People’s Choice Award
"Well, bitch, that’s what happens when you’re fucking Ellen DeGeneres."
Omfg can we appreciate matty from awkward sort of peering over to see Ellen bless him
WHAT about Norman’s face. MY GOD
Norman’s just like. “Are you fucking serious.? Again.?”
Seizure First Aid.
Learn it. Share it. Know it. Use it.
100% correct medical information on tumblr for once; also consider calling 911 if you don’t know how often the person has seizures and ESPECIALLY if the seizure has lasted 5 minutes or more (which is why the watch is critical)
I was about to say it would be helpful if it were explained why we need to time it, but I see a helpful sort has added this in. Well done, helpful sort.
May I also add, from being told previously by a seizure-prone person - no one is going to swallow their own tongue. That is not a thing. However, they may choke, suffocate, or otherwise suffer lacerations from you trying to shove something into their mouth to keep them from doing this impossible thing. On no account do this.
This is super important! I had someone seizure during one of my panels (no it was not our fault, there was no slideshow at this point, just us talking) and we were lucky enough to have a few people with medical knowledge around. Memorize these steps, please.
chocolate-covered cheesecake on a stick
i just made an elongated choking sound
i would deepthroat like 4 of these at one time.
i would eat it normally yall weird as fuck
i want to fuck the cheesecake
DONT FUCK THE CHEESCAKE
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